Can You Be Grateful All Month Long?

November is always the Thanksgiving month, the gratitude, the thankful month.  A whole month of gratitude?  We should certainly be grateful every single day for our blessings. But (always that "but") - how often do I find myself ungrateful, or grumbling, or complaining?  Any is too often.  Whatever is in the Believer's life is there because the Lord has allowed it.  All the Lord does is good.  He is sovereign, He is all-knowing.  For me, sinful and with extremely limited knowledge to complain or grumble about what he has given me is..well, it is ludicrous!

I just looked in my concordance for verses on thanks, thanksgiving, and all forms of blessings.  Way too many to list - that can be your project for today - look up a few of those verses and meditate on them!  It is going to be mine.

If we are to give thanks always, maybe focusing on it every day -through this little blog- could be a way to start.  To get in practice, as it were.

And I am already three days behind!

I can start off with gratitude to my Lord, Jesus Christ, for my salvation.  Here is a section of Psalm I read a few weeks ago that has plastered itself to my heart:
Some were fools through their sinful ways,
and because of their iniquities suffered affliction;
they loathed any kind of food,
and they drew near to the gates of death.
Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble,
and he delivered them from their distress.
He sent out his word and healed them,
and delivered them from their destruction.
Let them thank the LORD for his steadfast love,
for his wondrous works to the children of man.
And let them offer sacrifices of thanksgiving,
and tell of his deeds in songs of joy!
Psalm 107:17-22

That was me, dying and miserable in my sin, and the Lord reached down and softened this hard heart of stone, gave me a heart of flesh that I could have faith in Him.  He saved me, plain and simple.  Through no works of mine (so I can't boast!) but strictly by His mercy.

Day 2, for my wonderful family - Nevin and the guys.  I never dreamed of the life I would have, and some days I just wake up amazed at what the Lord has done.  This life is not perfect in the sense that the world uses - often the work is hard, the money is tight, and sometimes people just plain get on my nerves.  But, this is where God has put me, and even on days where I am struggling, I stop and realize that this blessing, this family, is so much more than I ever thought possible.


Monday was our 18th anniversary. Some years have been harder than others, but it has always been an adventure.  When I married Nevin I was one who never thought "outside the box".  I would have bought a newer house, with the income from my 8-5 job (where you got a regular paycheck with benefits), had 1.6 children, and done all the things you are just supposed to do.  Nevin not only thinks outside the box, I don't know if he'd recognize a box if he met it.  He was self-employed when I met him, and except for a brief foray into regular employment (because he knew I really wanted him to get a regular job, I think) he has always been.  He has gutted a very old house and made it our home, then he built this house in the middle of a forest.  He built a business, and then convinced me to leave my regular job and work with him.  Live in the forest, own a business, homeschool the kids, raise chickens, process your own deer meat....crazy, I know.  But here we are.  Anything is possible, and there are opportunities everywhere.  

He is deer hunting this weekend, so maybe absence makes the heart fonder!  But truly, I am so grateful for the husband God gave me, how he follows the Lord and leads us.

And for today.....grateful that I am almost done grading lab reports for my science co-op!  And so very grateful to see that they seem to be getting it, in spite of the somewhat haphazard instruction they are getting.

So, today, start practicing daily gratitude - let's do it together!  After a month, hopefully it will be instant and automatic!

A Little More Thankfulness Never Hurt

Here are just a few more things the Lord showed me this morning...

Nevin at work in the cabinet shop.  It is going to be 105 today.  The shop is not air conditioned, though he does have huge fans.  However, it is going to be HOT.  I am so thankful for a man who works hard for his family and built this business from nothing, with only his own brains and back.

And, by the way...

WE built this business, Mr. President!

Tony feeding the chickens

My beautiful Vivien.  How does she manage to stay on that rail???

Two things I am very thankful for - cats and fresh tomatoes!

They all find places in the various gardens to get out of the sun during the day.  Good for keeping away varmints, too!

Clean Socks and a Servant Heart

What exactly is a "servant heart"?  This blog post really got me thinking about it this morning Everyday Ordinary Dawnings.

In our homes, are we teaching our children to be servants, or is it "every man for himself"?  How do we respond to cries of unfairness, why should I have to clean up HIS mess?  I know that my standard response is that I have to clean up messes I don't make all day long, so why shouldn't everyone.

True, but perhaps not the best response.  It may be "fair" or equitable, in the interest of keeping all these equal.  But all things aren't equal.  We are called to serve each other in love.  Not in maintaining a proper balance of who owes who.

I joke about being the only lady in a house with five men.  Some days I get to be the princess.  Many days I am the serving wench.  That is actually a pretty good representation of my life.  But - is that the correct attitude?  It is funny, but is it correct? 

Having a servant heart means serving without thought of what I am getting back.  It means being the helpmeet that my husband needs - serving his actual needs, not just what I think I want to do, or what he should need, or even what I read in a book (written by a woman) about how I should serve him.  It means serving my children gladly.  In serving them with a glad heart, I can set an example of service to them.  If I holler, "Who left this here?  Do you think I am your servant?" this is not setting much of an example.

My husband just came in to get ready for work and commented that he has no clean socks.  Ouch.  That is a need he has.  I guess I could go on about how busy I have been lately (though I have had time to blog and facebook, so there you go), or about how many pairs of socks he and the boys go through, or about all the things I need to do today.  Or even suggest that perhaps after working at the shop all day he can be a modern fellow and take on 50% of the housework (maybe I can make a chart on Excel for him!).

Or I can just admit that I fell short there - I blew it.  Laundry has piled up and I missed getting the whites done.  And he did not speak harshly to me, he did not complain or grumble.  He just noted that he doesn't have any socks. 

And he set an example for me.  He mentioned it gently, and now I really want to rectify this, to make sure that he has socks and his needs are met.  If he would have snapped at me, "Can't a guy who works all day get a pair of clean socks?  How much time are you on the computer, anyway?" I would probably be less inclined to go do his laundry with a smile.  Would this gentle approach work better with my sons, as well? 

Wouldn't hurt to try!

On Accountability and the Friendship of Women

This post is in honor to my mom, Mary Katherine H., Andrea C., Tammy M., Laura A., Julia D., Becky H., Susan V., Angel B., Sherri E., Faith S. and the long list of women (not all of whom were older, a nod to Angel!) who have walked, and continue to walk, with me. Thank you for your friendship and your honesty.



Who do we choose as our closest friends? Do we choose those who lift us up, challenge us to be our best, and admonish us when we sin? Or do we take the easy route – find casual companions with whom we can be our “worst”? Do we choose to spend our time with those who by their participation encourage us in gossip, complaining, coveting or any other sin? Well?

There is a difference between friends and acquaintances. By friend, I do not mean Facebook Friend. While those lists may contain your close friends, I do not believe that anyone has over 400 people that they can share their hearts with. Most of us are lucky to have two or three our entire lives.

A true friend should be the ones who are willing to gently admonish you when they see you falling into a sinful pattern. But – they should not leave it there. It is no service to a sister to point out the specks (or logs) in her eye and then leave her to her sin. A true friend then encourages, uplifts, and covers you in prayer.

If I am in a friend relationship with someone who encourages me in sin, then I need to examine that. If this is someone that I consider a close friend, then I have made a poor choice in friendship. If it is a casual relationship, then I need to be on-guard and aware. I need to make an effort to lead all conversations to areas that are encouraging and Christ-honoring.

I would also recommend having a woman in your life that you can be held accountable by – someone that you respect enough to go to and to LISTEN to. If you are in a situation where you do not have such a person, you may want to examine that.

Are you in a church/faith family where you have no one that you would be willing to be held accountable to? Why?

Is there no one among your acquaintances that you respect enough to be held accountable by? Why not? Who are you surrounding yourself with?

And I hate to say it, but…….if you cannot find anyone that you respect enough to hold yourself accountable to them, are you perhaps esteeming your own self too highly? Surely there is someone out there who knows more than you and can teach you.

While my mother has been my guide, especially when I was a child, I have gone through several stages of accountability in my adult life. I have had several Godly women who took me under their wing when I was saved in 1993. They taught me how to live, how to love and respect others, how to follow God’s leading. Later, when I found how lacking I was in Bible knowledge, God led me to a lady who became a dear friend and who also taught me how to read the Bible, starting with baby steps. I had another dear lady who taught me about Biblical scholarship, the need to study and learn, to know my Bible and doctrine, preparing myself not to be puffed up with knowledge but to be able to teach when called.

Later, there have been others. There are women who have gone before me in child-rearing and homeschooling, whose example I have followed, and whose phone lines I have burnt up in distress. I have seen those women with God-honoring marriages, who speak respectfully of their husbands, never with put-downs or coarse jokes. These I have watched and try to emulate. And now there are those, as I approach (okay, as I have entered!) mid-life, who are gently leading me to my own role as the older woman, that I may be an encouragement to others. It is so humbling to see my sins become apparent, but so gracious of God to provide those who will hold me accountable in that, who are willing to say things that I may not like. Who are willing to give of their time (a precious commodity) and serve their Lord by instructing me and others.

So, what is a friend? Who do you call friend? And more importantly – who out there can call YOU friend?

That's right - a true friend challenges you on all sorts of levels!
Love you, Betty!

KILL ANGER BEFORE IT KILLS YOU OR YOUR MARRIAGE

This devotion is from John Piper's book Life As A Vapor.  I think we all deal with anger at some point - I was very convicted of this not only in how I should deal with those who make me angy, but in looking at those things that I may be (am!) doing to cause anger in others.  So often I think it is easy for us as Christians to hear these verses, and then turn our focus on to that "sandpaper" person who rubs us the wrong way.  But oftentimes we can forget (or choose to ignore) that we are ourselves sandpaper to someone else.
Paula


In marriage, anger rivals lust as a killer. My guess is that anger is a worse enemy than lust. It also destroys other kinds of camaraderie. Some people have more anger than they think, because it has disguises. When willpower hinders rage, anger smolders beneath the surface, and the teeth of the soul grind with frustration.

It can come out in tears that look more like hurt. But the heart has learned that this may be the only way to hurt back. It may come out as silence because we have resolved not to fight. It may show up in picky criticism and relentless correction. It may strike out at persons that have nothing to do with its origin. It will often feel warranted by how wrongly it has been treated. After all, Jesus got angry (Mark 3:5) and Paul says, Be angry and do not sin” (Eph. 4:26).
However, good anger among fallen people is rare. That’s why James says, “Be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness that God require” (James 1:19-20). And Paul says, “Men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling” (1 Timothy 2:8). “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you” (Eph. 4:31).

Therefore, one of the greatest battles of life is the battle to “put away anger,” not just control its expressions. In invite you to join me in this battle by adding these nine biblical weapons to your arsenal.

1. Ponder the right of Christ to be angry, by how He endured the cross, as an example of long-suffering. “For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you. Leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps.” (1 Pet. 2:21).

2. ponder how much you have been forgiven, and how much mercy you have been shown. “Be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (E[h 4:32).

3. Ponder your own sinfulness and take the beam out of your own eye. “Why do you see the speck that is in your bother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye’, when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye” (Matt 7:3-5).

4. Ponder how harbored anger gives place to the devil. You do not want to make room for him or invite him into your life, “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil” (Eph 4:26-27).

5. Ponder the folly of your own self-immolation, that is, the numerous de4trimental effects of anger to the one who is angry- some spiritual, some mental, some physical, and some relations. “Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD , and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones” (Prov 3:7-8).

6. Confess your sin of anger to some trusted friend, and if possible, to the offender. This is a great healing act. “therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed” (James 5:16).

7. Let you anger be the key to unlock the dungeons of pride and self-pity in your heart and replace them with love. “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy of boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” (1 Cor 13:4-7).

8. Remember that God is going to work all your frustrating circumstances for your good as you trust in His future grace. Your offender is even doing you good, if you will respond with love. “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28). “count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing” (James 1:2-4).

9. Remember that God will vindicate your just cause and settle all accounts better than you could. Either your offender will pay in hell, or Christ has paid for him. Your payback would be either double jeopardy or an offense the cross. (emphasis added by Paula). “Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord’” (Romans 12:19). “When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting (his cause) to him who judges justly” (1 Peter 2:23).

Father, I love Your patience toward me. I love it when You describe Yourself as slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.

Oh, to be more like You!

Have mercy on my easily angered heart!

Forgive my many peeves and murmuring.

Grant that I would be saturated with grace, and let me show it to others as I desperately need it for myself.

Because of Jesus,

Amen